Thursday, 26 January 2012

Horace and Bella...

"Come on Daisy, it's lunch time," says Emily.



"Otay Mummy," replies Daisy.

"Hey!" says the white rabbit.

"Where am I?"



"You're home now," replies the shabby grey rabbit.

"I'm Horace."

"Well Horace, my name is little fluffy cotton tail," says the white rabbit.

"No you're not," replies Horace.

"Excuse me, but I know my own name," says the white rabbit.



"Leave that fancy name at the door bud cause around here you're called Bella," replies Horace.

"What? Bella? Why?" Bella asks.



"Well you're Bella the third in reality but the little girl doesn't know that," says Horace with a wink.

"I'm a replacement?" Bella says.

"Double replacement," adds Horace.

"What happened to the other two?" Bella asks.

"Oh rabbit...where to begin," says Horace.

" Well...once there were three rabbits, Bella the first, Horace the first and little grey rabbit the first."

"Wait! You're a replacement too?" asked Bella. "Easter Bunny!"

"Watch your language bud!" cried Horace. "And yes, I'm a replacement."



"Now where was I?...Oh yes."

"Apperantly everything was fine and dandy."

"The rabbits kept Daisy happy and were rewarded with a trip to LA with the family."

" The holiday went well...a bit too well for the rabbits."

" The pull of sunny weather and glamour was too much for Bella and Horace...they jumped pram and defected on 
  
  the streets of Long Beach."




" Little grey rabbit was a bit more loyal but then he went to Disneyland and defected in Toontown."



"Wow!" said Bella."And what about the others?"

"I was part of the second trio and life was good but sadly it didn't last long," replied Horace.

"Bella the second defected at the department store we came from."

"But little grey rabbit two...well jumped pram in the middle of a road and hitched a ride under some car's tire."



"Ouch," said Bella

"So then they got me and another little grey rabbit right?"

"Not quite," replied Horace.

"Sup dawg," says little Hello Kitty.



"Don't ask," says Horace shaking his head.

"Bear...Horse!" cried Daisy.

"Oh! She's coming back!" says Horace

"There's a bear and horse?" Bella asks.

"What? No, that's our names in toddler," replied Horace.

"Now remember to just relax and go with it...and expect to lose your natural colour in the first ten minutes!"











































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Thursday, 12 January 2012

Sabotage at Wycliff Ave...



So there we were, trapped into a corner by the pirates.

"You've nowhere to run boy," said the captain. "Take his sword."

"How did you find me?" I asked.

Suddenly a small furry creature appeared from the shadows.

"Why me, naturally," said  opossum

"You betrayed us!" I cried.

"It's amazing what lengths one will go to for dry cat food," replied opossum. 

"Enough!"cried the Captain. "Let's be having our treasure back boy!"

I've been in some sticky situations before but this was trickiest of all my eight years. 

I gave Rocky the look that Luke gave R2 D2 on Jabba's barge. He nodded. 

"Treasure?" I said. "Why it's right here!"


Rocky released two hidden swords from his pockets and a great battle commenced...



...well until my Great Aunt called out "Snack time!".

"Sorry guys, gotta run," I said.

"I'll get you back boy!" cried the captain.




































When I got to the table there were graham crackers and kool aid. 

The graham crackers were amazing, as always and the kool aid...well not.

"This kool aid tastes gross Tia," I said.

"That's good miho," she replied.

Her hearing wasn't that great being eighty eight years old.

I have never had bad kool aid before, something wasn't right. Maybe it had been poisoned by the pirates! 



"The captain!...I knew it!" I cried. 

I had to get to the fridge before my sister drank it! 

She hadn't built a resistance to kool aid poison like I had, being fours year younger and all.

I raced to the fridge and grabbed the smiley faced pitcher. 



I Every thing seemed normal. 

It was red and smelled of artificial fruit...but then I saw it lurking at the bottom. 

I put my hand in and felt the squishy, slimy vile texture. 

" It can't be?" I thought. 

"Surely anything but this."

My worst fear was confirmed as I pulled my hand out and saw what I was holding...



...baloney.

To this day my family still don't know why the kool aid was spiked with baloney.

But I do...




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